Twenty Axioms of Riding

1. Every ride is optional. Every parking is mandatory.

2. If you push the bars left, the bike goes left. If you push the bars right, the bike goes right. That is, unless you continue pushing the bars all the way, in which case the bike will go down.

3. Riding isn’t dangerous. Crashing is dangerous.

4. It’s always better to be on the sidelines wishing you were on the track than on the track wishing you were on the sidelines.

5. The only time you have too much fuel is when you are on fire.

6. The rear wheel is just a big fan on back of the bike used to keep the rider cool and his butt relaxed. Going into a corner too fast and slamming on the rear brake causes the “fan” to abruptly stop. When this happens you can actually see the rider start sweating and his butt become tense.

7. When in doubt, slow down. No one has ever hit something too slow.

8. A good ride is one from which you can walk away. A great ride is one after which you can use the bike again.

9. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won’t live long enough to make all of them yourself.

10. You know you’ve left the side stand down when all left turn are bat-turns. You know you’ve left the center stand down when your in 1st gear at 4000 rpm going nowhere.

11. Never let a motorcycle take you somewhere your brain didn’t get to three seconds earlier.

12. Always try to keep the number of times you put your side stand down equal to the number of times you put the side stand up.

13. There are two simple rules for riding smoothly and fast in snow and on ice. Unfortunately no one knows what they are.

14. You start with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.

15. If all you can see in your mirrors is sparks and all you can hear is screaming from your passenger, things may not be as they should be.

16. In the ongoing battle between objects made of metal, rubber and fiberglass going 100+ miles per hour and the ground going zero miles per hour, the ground has yet to lose. Same holds for cars, large trucks, and animals taller than you. Draws don’t count.

17. Good judgment comes from experience. Unfortunately, the experience usually comes from bad judgment.

18. Keep looking around. There’s always something you’ve missed.

19. Remember, gravity and centrifugal force are not just a good ideas. They are laws and are not subject to appeal.

20. The two most useless things to a rider are the braking distance behind you and nine-tenths of a second ago.